Malessica's Cafeteria Cravings/Transcript
(The episode starts at Aberdale Elementary. Kimby, Courtlin and Malessica have lunch at the cafeteria.) Kimby: Well, did you see that new Raymond Rache movie? Courtlin: Oh, yeah. He was so hot in that film. Malessica: (mouthful) ''Yeah, I even liked that part where he kissed that hotty. ''(She eats her food so fast and chews it too loudly.) Kimby: Umm... are you feeling alright? Malessica: I feel wonderful. I love today's lunch. It's gelatin. Courtlin: yeah, we know. Malessica: I even brought whip cream along. (She pulls a can a whip cream out of her backpack.) I snagged this from the kitchen back at my house. It gives it a little more taste to it. Kimby: Uhh... neat. (whispering to Courtlin) ''How long will they serve so much of that jello? '''Courtlin' 26 days. I asked the lunch lady. Kimby: She's a goner. Malessica: 26 days? Woo-hoo! Courtlin: Really gotta work on our whispering. (A montage of Malessica having jello every day begins. She has it plain, then, another time, she has it with a strawberry on top. Then, the third time she has it with a bunch of cherries Day after day, as she has jello, she's beginning to put on weight. She notices her shirt feel tight and her stomach stick out. She tries to pull it down, but, gives up.) Malessica: (scoffs) ''Laundry. ''(The next day at school, she wears a zippered jacket, a pink hat and blue jeans with a belt. She enters the classroom, but, gets stuck in the door. The students stare at her.) Clarence: Something's different about Malessica. Sumo: New glasses? Jeff: Sumo, those are the same glasses she wears. I'm thinking a new haircut. Ms. Baker: Malessica. You've... grown. Malessica: Thanks. (She finally gets loose.) Ms. Baker: Take your seat. (She walks to her seat and sits down. She finds out her new size couldn't support it. It then breaks.) Breehn: Need a hand? (While not looking at Breehn, Malessica tries to get up on her own.) Malessica: No thanks! (She tries, while straining.) ''Come on! ''(She fails and exhales) ''OK. ''(Breehn helps her up. Malessica tilts her head up, then turns and sees Breehn's face. She becomes in awe and her heart beats.) Ms. Baker: Alright, back in your seats, now! (Later, she has lunch with her friends and her stomach sticks out of her jacket.) Courtlin: OK, this has gotten way too far. You need to eat something not... making you larger. Malessica: Who cares? What's the worst that can happen? (She eat a handful of tater tots. Then, her belt snaps off, including the button on her pants popping off.) Courtlin: That could. Listen, Malessica. You're our friend and all. But, this? It's about to get outta control. You'll see. (Kimby and her walk off.) Malessica: That's what you think. You'll be wrong. W-R-O-N-G! Wrong. (The next day, at Kimby's house...) Courtlin: Do you think she's gonna have a heart attack soon? Kimby: Now that you mention it, I'm worried. (Malessica walks in with the same clothes she wore yesterday.) Kimby: Oh, hi. Malessica: (sweetly) Kimby. (dryly) Courtlin. (Courtlin crosses her arms and turns her back.) Kimby: Err... You know, your new appearance reminds me of me when I was overeating. Malessica: Yeah, we were there. Courtlin: Oh, would you look at the time. You need to go now. (She shoves Malessica down the stairs, as she rolls like a ball. After rolling down the stairs, she rolls out the door and into the neighborhood.) Kimby: I think that we need to get an expert to help out Malessica. (At Breehn's house, Kimby and Courtlin are in Breehn's bedroom to ask for help.) Breehn: I think it's great that someone's comes to me for help. Courtlin: Cut the crud, bud! We have a friend getting fitted for wider door in Heaven. Breehn: (pause) ''Overeating? '''Kimby': Uh, yeah. Breehn: Well... (Later, Malessica arrives at Kimby's house, while eating a chocolate bar. Once she arrives at the door, a hand grabs Malessica inside. Inside, Kimby and Courtlin have her pinned down to the floor.) Both: Intervention! Malessica: What the heck?! (Breehn walks to Malessica.) Breehn: Hello, Malessica... again. Malessica: O.M.G., is this one of those talk things? Breehn: You mean an "intervention". And yes. (Later, they sit down in Kimby's room.) Malessica: Listen, I'll stop if it makes you happy, alright? Kimby: Promise us. Malessica: (talking fast) I promise I will never eat any unhealthy foods again, guys! Breehn: Is that so? Malessica: Yeah, cross my heart I'll never eat unhealthy again. Breehn: Good. (Breehn snaps his fingers and the girls tie up Malessica's arms and legs with shoe lasses.) Malessica: What gives? Let go of me! Courtlin: We will. Breehn: When we get to the weight loss camp. Malessica: What? You double crossers! Let me go at once! Or I'm gonna...! (Courtlin puts duck tape on Malessica's face.) Courtlin: I knew you lied. Let's go. (Breehn and the girls carry Malessica to the door After they do, Breehn and Courtlin hold Malessica as Kimby closes the door slowly.) Courtlin: Alright, help us with Queen of the Blobs. (A black background appears and has white text says, "17 minutes Later..." Now showing Breehn and the girls still carrying the heavy Malessica, who are far away from the neighborhood and into town.) Kimby: I wish we could carry her without carrying her. Courtlin: Oh, Please. How? (Later, they found a missing shopping cart and Malessica's inside it. Breehn and the girls push.) Breehn: Were we lucky we found this cart. Courtlin: (relieved) Yeah. (Later, they arrive at the Aberdale Fitness Center. They take Malessica out of the cart and untie her. She feels sleepy. They go inside. Later...) Female Trainer: You've come to the right place. Sally Timm: I opened this place yesterday. But, no one came. Though, today... My first customer. Malessica: Look, this is a big misunderstanding. They tied me up, put me in a cart and brought me here. Because I said, "I promise I will never eat any unhealthy foods again, guys!" But, I was kidding. Sally: Well, sorry sister, your in my town now. Weight Loss, USA! Malessica: (thinking) This is gonna be a blood bath. Sally: Well, what do you say? Wanna join? (Malessica nervously smiles and nods. Courtlin sports an sinister smile. Breehn and Kimby feel concerned.) '' ''(Later, training begins. Malessica does push-ups.) Sally: Alright, Malessica. That's you first step of losing weight. Malessica: Yeah, thanks. (Sally leaves. After she does, Malessica stops doing push-ups and eats a chocolate bar. Now, she's on a treadmill.) Malessica: Impressed? Sally: Yep. (Sally leaves again. Malessica pulls out a container a marshmallow spread.She opens the lid, dips her finger in it and licks it off. Now, she's on the vibrating belt machine.) Malessica: How much longer? This feels kinda nice. Sally: (mutters to herself) ''I wonder why she hasn't lost a single pound. ''(She speaks normally to Malessica.) One more hour if you like. Malessica: Thanks. Sally: I guess you have this under control. So... I'll leave you alone. (She leaves and Malessica turns to the opposite side. She unzips her jacket and takes out a bag of cubby worms and eats them.) Malessica: This is the perfect dream and nightmare come true. (Meanwhile, with Breehn and the girls...) Kimby: I think we might be wrong doing this. Breehn: It was for her own good. Are you with us, or her? Courtlin: I remember at school you said, "Now that you mention it, I'm worried." Kimby: Yeah, but, I think we might be doing the wrong thing. We could've told her parents about this. Breehn: Huh. Now, that you mention it, we should have. Courtlin: I know, you're all on your side. Be on his side, you double crosser! I'm no longer on anybody's side. (She leaves Kimby's room and slams her door.) Kimby: Uh, I think she kinda turned her back in us. (Courtlin walks in the neighborhood.) Courtlin: What's wrong with them now? I'm doing this because, she might have a heart attack. (pause) ''Oh, I should've told them that. Oh, wait. I did. What's wrong with ''me? I feel like a big jerk! I gotta fix this. Speaking of which, I wonder how she's doing. (After training, Malessica pulls out a chocolate bar and eats it.) Sally: Malessica! I knew what you were going behind my back and I'm real disappointed in you. Malessica: But, I did just like that vibrating belt thingy. It makes a good back massager. Sally: (sighs) Girl, I'm gonna take you to a place where you oughta change your mind. (Now, they arrive at a weight loss camp.) Sally: Take a look. Malessica: A fat camp?! (She sees a coach yelling at his trainer to jog faster. The second coach orders his trainers to do push-ups. The third one has his trainers lifting weights.) Malessica: No, Sally! No! (She hyperventilates.) ''I promise I'll... ''(Her heart beats.) Oh, my heart! Sally: Drink this. (Malessica drinks the bottle of water Sally gave her.) Malessica: Sorry, I promise I'll exercise. From now on. Sally: Good for you! (Meanwhile, Courtlin presses the intercom button.) Sally's Voice: Hello? Courtlin: Yeah? I... Sally's Voice: Sorry. But, I'm gone. Please come back again. (She presses the button again.) Sally's Voice: Yes? Courtlin: Look, I just wanna talk to my frie... Sally's Voice: If you pressed this button again, please know that this is a recorded message. Good day, sir or ma'am. (Now, Courtlin walk on the highway.) Courtlin: Malessica? Malessica? (Clarence, Jeff and Sumo walk by.) Jeff: Hey, what's going on? Courtlin: I'm looking for Malessica. Two months back, she was having gelatin and other junk food that made her into a parade float. Clarence: Ohh, that's what was different about her. Sumo: Yeah. I remember when I... Jeff: Ebebebebebebebebebebebeb! No! Sumo: Sucking the joy out of everything. (Sally's car passes by.) Jeff: Why's Malessica in the car of the Unfamous Sally Timm? Courtlin: Malessica! (She goes after the car, but, stops.) ''Wait. Unfamous? '''Sumo': We heard about the new fitness center, and noticed Sally Timm's running the place. Clarence: Sally Timm's the new person that came her twelve days ago. Sumo: She's one gal that you should never know. But, if you did... wham! Four of us know her. (Courtlin turns her head and sees the car's gone.) Coutlin: Gotta go! Jeff: Bye! Sumo: Don't say we didn't warn you! (She runs as fast as she can to catch the car. She passes by Breehn and Kimby, who are looking for Courtlin.) Kimby: That was Courtlin! Come on! (Courtlin sees Malessica. Inside, Malessica's asleep.) Courtlin: Hey! Stop! (Sally hears slightly. She rolls down the driver's seat window.) Courtlin: Stop! (Sally stomps on the break and stops. Courtlin almost hits her head on the back of the car. Sally and Malessica get out of the car. Breehn and Kimby arrive.) Malessica: Courtlin? Guys? Courtlin: Malessica! I'm sorry for sending you to that center. Malessica: Not to mention, being a jerk and tying me up. Courtlin: Also, Sally has a confession. Kimby/Breehn/Malessica: She does? Sally: You knew? Well, I'm actually not the unfamous Sally Timm. Both: Wha? Sally: I'm actually... (She pours water on her hair and her orange hair's actually brown. She then, puts lipstick on her lips.) ''...the famous Kathie Browen. '''Courtlin': Tell us why. Kathie: I was run out of Aberdale one year ago. Because of a show that backfired. So, I snuck back to town twelve days back by disguised myself as Sally Timm. And nobody cared who I am. Which was bad. Malessica: Well, sorry for your show and your life. Plus, I have friends to be with. Kathie: Go on. I think I need new customers anyhow. As for my first customer, your training is all on the house. Go on, be kids. (They all leave.) Courtlin: Listen, I was just concerned that you would have a heart attack someday. Or would die early. Malessica: I had one today. It was painful. But, I washed it down with a bottle of water that Sally gave me. Breehn: Actu... (pause) Nevermind. (The episode ends with a sunset and them walking in the neighborhood.) Malessica: I forgive you, girl. Courtlin: Thanks. We're still gonna try to get that weight off you. Malessica: Oh, give me a break! (Cut to black.) Category:Transcripts Category:Episode Transcripts Category:Do not delete or remove the transcript